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Waking up early in the morning and deciding the night before to jog has always been a difficult routine for me. I’m used to getting out of bed at around 9AM during weekends since I’m aware that I wouldn’t be doing anything for the entire day. But lately, I’ve been having this urge to run. Maybe this is one of the effects of seeing people run marathons nowadays.

I decided to run my first 3K marathon last June 27. Along with a couple of my officemates, we registered to join the ACE Hardware-Davies Eco-Friendly Run at the Mall of Asia. Two weeks prior to that, I decided to get myself fit for it since I don’t want to cause any embarrassment during the run. The thought of fainting and gasping for a hell lot of air and eventually dying while in the midst of the run continues to bug my mind. Haha! Morbid right?

So there, I registered, practiced and somehow even got a new pair of running shoes just for this event. (Talk about being a “virgin” at running, lol!)

Alas, the day of the run came, I went to the venue, met my friends then started jogging to what seemed like an endless 3K. I’d admit, I wasn’t able to complete the entire 3K by JUST running. I had to walk. Yes, you read it right, WALK half of it – oh what the heck, the whole 2.5K!

But while doing the WALKathon, I realized a lot of things.

In life, no matter how fast paced it may be, and no matter how drastic changes could happen, we must all take a breather. A time or a moment to indulge ourselves in what seems to be the “beauty” that surrounds us.

If we decide to go fast, we tend to miss a lot of things.

If we decide to go slow, there’s a big chance of getting left out.

If we decide to just jog in place, there will be no growth or improvement from us.

And if we choose to go along with the flow, surprises would surely come our way.

These things and a lot more, made me think about what I want in life. Or rather, how I’m currently running my own journey.

I also realized that I’m depending too much on everyone. That I am so used to their presence which makes me feel like everything is comfortable.  But it is not.

A few meters away from the finish line, I snapped back to reality. I dashed for the last 10 meters and there, it was done.

Just when I thought that he run was over, another realization came up to me. Seeing the line of people beyond the finish line, in queue for the so-called freebies, waiting there instead of just resting, made me think about this:

Every individual goes through a lot of challenges in life. It doesn’t matter if it’s difficult or not. As long as you decide for yourself that you’ll be able to overcome it, life will definitely give you a lot of good stuff in the end.

Yes, running is good. Not just for the health, but also for one’s life.


July 21, 2010

Solo Flight

Trials happen in any way possible.

As for me, I’ve been trying to avoid a lot of them lately. I keep on telling myself that I can deal with them later since I still got a lot more things to worry about.

But it caught up on me.

Then I realized, I have to stop running away from those things that really need my attention.

I have to face them.

But before doing that, I need to go away for a while. Like a solo trip – or whatevah they call it.

I need to contemplate and gather my thoughts in the rightest way possible.

Think a lot since I gotta make a very important decision which involves someone i love so much.

And yes, I really need that break for myself since a lot of blurry stuff has been going on lately.

Hmm, so should i stay or should i go?

Growing Up

It’s been quite a while since my last post on this blog. I’d admit, I’m a certified workaholic now and it’s been taking a lot of my time lately.

So let me give you an overview of what’s happening on the different aspects of my life.


I work for 10 hours (which includes the 1-hour 30-minute meal breaks) so to put it simply – I’m a total work-whore. Lol

But the work itself isn’t that hard. I still get to check my Facebook and Twitter accounts; chat on YM; even munch on some unhealthy afternoon snacks; and somehow, endlessly browse the net for news updates.

That’s my typical work day and what keeps me engrossed to it is the fact that it is the job that I truly want.

I really can’t stand going back to the call center industry here in the Philippines. It just stresses me a lot and drains more of my stocked knowledge. Although I’m quite grateful for the salaries that they gave me since I was able to support my family.

So there, work right now is better than before.


Well, we’re still having the same type of problems based on previous posts. I think it’s really proven that although money satisfies our hunger and some other physiological needs, it also tends to destroy relationships. In this case, it’s starting to put a crack on our family.

People would oftentimes bicker and blame each other for the problems that are happening. Mostly, they would bring up past mistakes that are not that really important anymore.

Whenever I’d get home from work, I would see my mom sitting quietly in our room – crying. I would console her and ask her to tell me what the problem was all about.

I don’t know what the heck’s happening with our family now. We’re all drifting apart and somehow, I can see its advantages and disadvantages.

Somehow, I’m quite glad that I spend my entire 10 hours at work. It means that I’m away from all of this chaos that’s happening in our house for 10 glorious hours.

But I’m not happy with that. I want my family fixed. I want our house to be filled with laughter again. To have all of us eat lunch and dinner in one table every Sunday.

But I guess it’ll take some time for us to experience that again.


Recently, I was able to hang out with some good old high school buddies.

They’re still the same old silly guys that I was with back then. The usual asaran, alaskahan and barahan completes everything. Being with them again is certainly one of my rare happy moments.

Hmm, come to think of it, I only really have a few close friends in high school. Usually, I’d hang around some groups (usually for companionship) but right before we left our senior year, I knew I’ve found those really true people that I’m proud to call friends.

Keeping them close up to now is one of my top priorities in life.


I won’t give a lot of details about my love life right now.

Let’s just say that things are quite complicated as of the moment.

We’re taking a breather from everything.

But I’m sure, we still love each other.

So there goes a quick glimpse of what’s been going on with my life.

I’ll try to make it a point to update this blog every weekend okay?

xoxo Neids xoxo

Dancing in the Rain

“Let the rain fall down, and wake my dreams, let it wash away my sanity, coz i wanna hear the thunder, i wanna scream, let the rain fall down, i’m coming clean… – Come Clean by Hilary Duff”

Right before I wrote this blog, I saw a bunch of kids play and frolic in the rain. I happen to know some of them since they would always play in our computer shop. Seeing them enjoy the rain and swishing waters on each others bods, I started reminiscing the times when I used to be like that.

Hmm, Come to think of it, I can barely remember the last time that I really enjoyed getting wet in the rain. Coz just barely a week ago, I experienced “hell” that was brought by it.

Well, i was supposed to meet a friend for a dinner with her family by 6pm in a posh resto in West Ave. QC. Apparently, i was still stuck in Makati by 5pm. So I barely have an hour to transport myself from South to North! So there, i took the 5:00 train to Q.Ave and by-golly, halfway through it, the rain started pouring.

I thought to myself, “hey, kaya ko yan, mahina lang naman eh..” But man, it seemed like the god of rainshowers wanted to mock me so he may have turned on the rain to full blast and by the time the train reached Q.Ave., 6pm seemed like 8pm. It was super dark talaga, and what made it worse was that I didn’t bring my umbrella!

What happened next was that i found myself handing over P50.00 to a vendor who’s about to give me a black umbrella. I bought it for the sake of not getting wet despite the Armageddon-ish rain. So i took the umbrella, trodded through the stream of waters and went on my way to the resto. upon getting there, i literally looked like a “basang sisiw“.😀

And the fact that my super nice get-up was ruined, the only thing that made me forget about that incident was that i was served with a steamy crab soup and an endless buffet and a warm welcome from my friend thanking me for making it there despite of the hell i just experienced outside.😀

I told you about that story coz I wanted to emphasize something that adults, like me, may have forgotten. (wow, can’t believe i’d incline that term on me)

At one point in our lives, we all wanted to play in the rain again. Getting wet, run and splatter each other with those colds drops of water is truly an enjoyable experience. It makes us forget all our problems; all our worries in life; and every inch of the negative emotions inside us are miraculously washed away – even just for a mere period of time.

We all wanted to become kids again. The time where our only problem was when Mommy or Daddy (or sometimes Yaya) woudn’t allow us to go out in the rain with our friends.  And that was it. No buts. No ifs.

So yeah, i wanna play outside and get wet in the rain. In that way, I’ll get a taste again of what it was like to become a kid. Even if it’s only until the sun shines again.

Of Friends, Love and Family

4th Year School FairFriends

This picture was taken on our 4th year School Fair in SMMS. So far, that was the best Fair i’ve ever been and participated with. Everyone enjoyed up to the very last minute and if given the chance, we’d all wanna do it all over again.

Yeah, i would gladly oblige to experience being on that fair again. Why? Coz i wanna be with my high school friends. They are the ones that i truly miss the most since they knew, saw and understood the real me.

I would always remember the bonding times we spent at Mang Bok’s cafè right after class and we’d share our insights on what happened the entire day. Stories and conversations talked over a glass of Mocha Frappe and Vanilla Milkshake made our bonds stronger than before.

So yeah, i miss them a lot.



On the 9th day of the 9th month of the year ’09, we’d be reaching our 4th month.

Hmm, well technically, itd be the 9th month that we’ll be together since we started going out on January.

Anyway, i just love looking at this pic and i wanted to share it to whoever reads my blog.

I took this pic while we’re having breakfast at Mcdo J.Vargas. I remember telling my Honey that whatever happens, i’d always be around for him. And that thing will eventually be okay.

Last Great Family Pic with Nanay

Last New Year Pic with Nanay

On Sept. 10, it’ll be officially 4 months since Nanay passed away.

I miss her badly. I never had the chance to say goodbye to her. Nor talk and hug her. I wasn’t there on her side when she breathed her last.

However, my whole family helped me cope up with the loss. We were never afraid of expressing what we feel about Nanay’s passing and if we need to cry about it, we just do it.

Now, the holidays are just a few months away and it makes us miss her more. This will be the first or rather the 2nd time that someone dear won’t be with us to celebrate.

I don’t know what’ll happen or how we’d do it, but we all just wish that our loved ones would be with us again.

Sunshine after the rain

it may sound clichè but things here at home are turning out pretty well now..

it’s like seeing a very beautiful sunshine after a thunderstorm..

Patience vs Faith

Whenever one experiences a trial in their life, people would tell them to “always have faith in God” That you should just trust God to lay down His plans for you at the right time.

But I’m beginning to become cynical about it.

Since my grandmother died last May, our family never passed a single day without dealing with a problem. Neither of us knows what went wrong with our family; all we can think about is that we have to survive these trials together.

But there are times that we all wanted to give up.

We are all scared that the day will come wherein we have to give up every thing we have.

Well, these past 2 weeks have been the most terrible weeks I’ve ever had in my entire life. Our family reached rock bottom.

I would see my mom and tita cry silently in our respective rooms. Why are they crying? Its because we are all becoming so hopeless. We are all losing patience.

Yeah, patience.

Patience for asking for help from EVERYONE we know.

Patience for dealing with every day struggles like thinking about where to get money to pay our debts, to buy food, to give baon to the kids.

Patience towards God.

See,  i do sound like a person who’s so helpless that I’m even blaming God for every thing that happening in our lives.

I know what you’ll say, “Neids, you have to be strong. You have to keep your faith in God. Be patient. All of this will be over soon.”

But can you blame me for feeling that way? You have no right.

You are not in my current position.

You are not the one who’s experiencing this kind of problem.

But I am not giving up.

The Real Ones

It took me quite some time to figure out what blog should I write tonight. Then, I received a text from a former officemate telling me that she’s going to help me with a certain problem that I’m having right now.

And then I thought, for the past years that I’ve made a series of friendships, how many of these people have really seen me at my worst?

How many of them have seen me in the lowest points of my life?

I wonder, will they be able to help me with my current ordeal?

And so i tested them. I sent a select number of people and sent them a message saying I need their help. Out of the 25 people I texted, e-mailed and sent IMs to… 5 replied… 2 offered help.

I don’t want to sound like I’m bragging about those 2 people who offered me help. It’s just that, during the lowest times of some of my so-called friends, I was there to help them.

I was there to console them during the most trying times in their lives.

I would even spend a night on their sides just to ensure that they’d be safe and that they’d be okay.

I don’t know if somebody’s reading this, but all i want to express is this:

I am not always the strong, happy, funny and giving person that you see. I have my weak moments too. And right now, I’m experiencing them. And I need a friend’s help. A friend’s support. It doesn’t have to be financial or physical. Just the assurance that a friend is there to listen to me. To love me. To assure that everything’s gonna be alright.

So there. I may have hurted a few of you who read this, but then, if you are a real friend of mine, you will understand what I was talking about.


What We Miss the Most

It’s so funny when you get to start a topic and people find it really interesting and funny that they eventually contribute and have it posted over and over again.

So a few days ago, I opened up a discussion page on our SMMS Batch 2003 group account in Facebook and by golly, I’m having lots of fun reading their replies!

I mean, it’s been 6 years since we all left St. Martin but we can still recall all those memories…

Memories that became a huge part of our lives…

If you want to view the said topic just click this.

Oh yeah, I almost forgot, you can also check out our high school pics here.

Enjoy! ^^,

Keep moving forward

From Failure, you can learn. From Success, not so much.
– quoted from the movie Meet the Robinsons (Disney)